Hearty Kale Salad

  • 3 cups kale, destemmed and chopped
  • 1 can chickpeas, drained and rinsed
  • 1/2 Tablespoon oil
  • 2 Tablespoons tamari
  • 1.5 Tablespoons Frank's Red Hot hot sauce
  • 1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
  • 1/4 teaspoon oregano
  • 1/4 teaspoon onion powder
  • 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
  • dash of cayene
  • dash of salt
  • 1 avocado
  • 2-3 Tablespoons tahini
  • juice of 1/2 lemon
  • 2-3 radishes (optional)
  • 2-3 Tablespoons pepitas (optional)
  • Preheat oven to 400°. 
  • Add chickpeas, oil, tamari, hot sauce, garlic powder, oregano, onion powder, black pepper, cayenne, and salt to roasting pan. Stir. Roast chickpeas for 30 minutes. Check and stir every 10 minutes. 
  • While chickpeas are roasting, destem, chop, and plate your kale. Slice avocado and chop radishes, if using. 
  • Top kale with roasted chickpeas, avocado, radishes, and pepitas. Dress with tahini and lemon juice. 

Fill the hungry with good things

I don't believe in dainty salads and I don't believe you should be hungry after eating one. Salads should be hard to finish and so tasty that you can't help but push through. I should probably apply that same thought process to working out. Meh. Oh well.

This salad is flexible. Super hungry? Add some cooked quinoa. Not that hungry? Cut the avoado or chickpeas in half. This recipe is for one large salad or 2 medium size salads. Remember, recipes on the Internet are your guide to a meal, not the Holy scripture.

Speaking of Scripture. Happy Easter, everyone! Did y'all have a good lent journey? Originally, I was going to try a raw diet. I found all this stuff online about eating raw and it involved an obnoxious amount of fruit (remember, I don't really like fruit all that much). I gave it a shot. I doubled my grocery bill for a week. Strike number one. I was supposed to be simplifying what I ate!

I had to make a 3-hour trip for work on the first day of lent. I drank 32-ounces of orange juice at noon and I didn't eat my fruit chutney until 4. The chutney, consisting of 6 pears, spinach, and an entire container of berries, made me so effing sick that I had to pray to God I wouldn't puke in my co-worker's car. Strike 2.

Later, I found out the research I had gathered about raw eating was some outlandish approach to the concept. See? THE INTERNET IS NOT SCRIPTURE. Strike 3. Ultimately, I gave up Taco Bell. Hey, don't judge. That was a serious sacrifice for me and the inspiration for this series of quick and easy vegan recipes.

Kale is the star in this vegan lunch recipe and my life. It is by far my favorite green. It's best feature is it's texture. As my co-worker would say, "you can leave it in a bathtub for a week and it's still going to be firm". Despite the fact I'm totally revolted by the idea of food in the bathtub, it's true! Even David Putty agrees. If you think kale is bitter, I recommend tossing it with a little olive oil, lemon juice, and salt. 

Take your time roasting the chickpeas. Let them get crunchy because you know what? They are going to remind you of croutons if you do. You should definitely top the salad with avocado. I also highly recommend adding pepitas and radishes, if you've got them on hand.

This salad is no joke. I had to pace myself while I ate this and I hope you do, too. 

Kendrik Lamar


This is jazz, this is soul, this is funk, this is gospel; this is santified sick, this is player pentecostal; this is church, front pew, amen, pulpit; what my people need and the opposite of bullshit


"Start some shit," but keep it cool.
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